More than often, I have relatives, who after watching one too many 6pm Hong Kong soap operas, suggested leaving me in a burning house, and by some miracle, to save myself, I would stand up and walk. If only it is that simple to make me regain my motor functions again, I would not be still on a wheelchair after nearly twenty two years.

For me to walk again, that is after my damaged spinal cord has been repaired, a lot of muscles need to be exercised. After that, I need to regain my balance. It may even take months or years of physiotherapy to correct my posture. The decades of sitting down would have created a host of problems for bones, tendons and muscles. I may still need to catheterise every three hourly and wear diapers to prevent accidents. That is only the beginning. It is absolutely impossible to shock me into walking again through fear.

In the initial years after my paralysis, I had dreams of a miracle like that happening to me. As the years passed by, that dream gradually fizzled out. Now I have accepted my condition. This has allowed me to move on with life, make plans to work around my paralysis and not waste time hoping for the day that may never come.

Therefore, I could not help but nod in agreement when reading the following news at Yahoo that said comatose patients are being misrepresented in movies. If it was as simple as regaining consciousness, getting up and just walk away after years being in a coma, it would have solved a lot of problems, especially from the rehabilitation point of view.

Likewise, paralysis, especially spinal cord injury is being misrepresented in the same manner. Movies and shows have depicted paraplegics somehow miraculously being able to walk again when faced with danger or life-threatening situations. That is utter bollocks. If only my well-meaning relatives realise that leaving me in a burning house can never make me walk again but will most probably cause me to be burnt to death, perhaps they will stop going on and on with that hare-brained scheme.

Coma misrepresented on the big screen

By Megan Rauscher
2 hours, 49 minutes ago

NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - The portrayal of coma and awakening from a coma is grossly inaccurate in major motion pictures, research shows, and many moviegoers are unable to tell fact from fiction. They admit that what they see in films regarding coma may impact real-life decisions for a loved one.
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In a review of 30 movies from 1970 to 2004 with actors depicting prolonged coma, coma experts found that only two showed a “reasonably accurate” representation of coma.

Problems with the depiction of coma included comatose patients, without feeding tubes, suddenly waking after years of being in a coma with no physical or mental problems and with a Sleeping Beauty-like appearance.

“Miraculous awakening from prolonged coma with no long-lasting effects was a typical feature,” report Dr. Eelco F. Wijdicks, a neurologist at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota, and his son Coen Wijdicks, who is working on a master’s degree in anatomy and cell biology at Rush University in Chicago.

Not showing typical coma-related effects such as muscle wasting, bed sores and incontinence may be a conscious decision on the part of filmmakers to “maximize entertainment but is a disservice to the viewer,” they write in the journal Neurology.

Virtually all of the films showed the comatose person with eyes shut at all times, when in reality people in comas often have their eyes open or open them in response to speech or pain.

One film showed a comatose person tapping out a message in Morse code with his finger. “We expected misrepresentation - not gross representation,” Eelco Wijdicks told Reuters Health.

As part of their study, the Wijdicks showed clips of 22 scenes depicting coma from 17 of the movies to 72 people with no medical training and asked them how accurately the comatose state was portrayed.

“We expected that the viewing public would recognize the inaccuracies, but we were surprised by the high number of viewers who thought some of the scenes were very plausible,” Eelco Wijdicks commented.

For example, more than one-third of the time, viewers were unable to spot important inaccuracies in the scenes and 39 percent of viewers admitted that what they saw in the scenes might influence their decisions if a family member were in a coma.

“The public has become more sophisticated in their medical knowledge and we presume they would appreciate a more accurate display of devastating neurologic injury,” write the Wijdicks in their report.

SOURCE: Neurology, May 9, 2006

I keep nodding off in front of the laptop. It is only 9.45am now. I am going back to bed with a deep sense of guilt. It is a wonder how Wuan could keep this up all the time when I am around - waking up at 5am to cook for me before going off to work. Most evenings, she gets off work at around 7pm, reaches home at 8pm and often retires for the day way past midnight.

It is 5.15am. I am awake at this God-forsaken hour because Wuan is already up and about in the kitchen preparing my lunch before going to work. This is one of the reasons why I am reluctant to stay in KL for too long. Five hours of sleep per day is simply insufficient for her.

Suria KLCC Bloggers Meet. (L-R clockwise) Colin, Suanie (partially hidden), Reta, Albert, Ivan, Linggesh, Alan, Titoki (partially hidden), Peter, Eyeris and Erna.
Photo by Wuan.

Suanie to Reta: Eleh, u think u eye me liddat I sked ah?

Reta making a pass at me while Suanie was busy with her food. Albert was reading his own palm.

Eyeris intimidating us with the mother of all fixed lense digicams.
Photo by Wuan.

The mob at Suria KLCC Concourse. L-R: Ivan (in blue), Linggesh, Jack, Reta, Alan, Peter, Colin, Suanie and Titoki.
Photo by Wuan.

Suanie with Erna.
Photo by Wuan.

The blogger girls just could not get enough of me. L-R: Erna, Suanie, Reta and Titoki.
Photo by Wuan.

Reta got left out of my bonding session with Suanie and wished she had a knife.
Photo by Wuan.

The attendees (taken from Alan’s site):
Reta and Eric the boyfriend.
Wuan
Ivan
Linggesh.
Alan
Titoki
Eyeris
Albert
Colin
Jack
Suanie
Erna

Related entires:
Eye On Everything - You and what mob?
Fading Sanity - mini random bloggers’ meeting/Hummer/Wedding Dinner
BP Bites - The Flash Mob That Fizzled
Titoki’s Secret Diary - Were you flashed?
Distance- random bloggers meet part1
Lingghezhi - Blogger’s Meet @ KLCC
As Suanie Sees It - random sunday photos

After the rain.
Photo by Wuan.

The damage has been done. There is absolutely no possibility of reversing the condition. Vesicoureteral reflux is one of the main causes of my chronic renal failure. Other contributing factors include several episodes of acute and chronic urinary tract infections, diet, travelling and stress. What is certain is that my kidneys will continue to fail up to a stage where I will need dialysis. That is the prognosis.

Accepting the condition, no matter how bleak the prognosis, is the only way to move on. I am one who likes to work with a lot of slack but this is not giving me much space to manoeuvre. Each time I think about it, I could feel the noose tightening around my neck. Living with so many restrictions, especially in my diet and the need to catheterise every three hours, is difficult but not unachievable. Adjustments have to be made.

Trips out have to be carefully planned. If need be, there must be food outlets nearby that are willing to cook to suit my diet or serve food that are suitable. Meals have to be taken at appropriate times to accomodate my medication. Clean accessible toilets have become even more important now. Water intake has to be regulated in order not to over or under-hydrate.

Those routines must be strictly adhered to from now on. Detrusitol must be taken one hour before food twice daily. The three doses of Ketosteril have to be spread out to optimise absorption. In between that, intermittent catheterisations have to be performed three-hourly. I am gradually getting used to this regiment. It is imperative that I abide by it to slow down the progression. This has become a do-or-die routine and I have chosen to live a little longer.

Where do I go from here? I asked myself that question a while back when I was struggling with housework and trying to maintain my diet. The weeks of soul searching after those weeks of depression has made me realise several things. The situation is neither as bad or as hopeless as it seemed. What I needed to do is to continue moving. Whether I like it or not, if I allow myself to wallow in the depths of despair, the world will continue to march on, with or without me. It is either that I keep up or be left behind. The competitive person that I was and still am, I dislike being a back marker.

This is one of those potholes in life. Sometime all is smooth. Sometimes it is a bumpy ride. I have survived twenty two years. I pray for another twenty to accomplish the things that I have set out to do. Knowing my own melancholic nature, depression will be a constant companion, more so when I can hear the seconds of my life ticking away loud and clear. There is a need to balance my emotional volatility in these areas. Keeping the occasional anxiety attacks at arm’s length will not be a simple task

However, I know for sure that Wuan will always be there to give me that little push from behind to keep me going. She is heaven-sent - an angel who is always there to brighten up my days. I have prayed for and have been bestowed with a purpose in life. I believe that when I bring hope for others, I am bringing hope for myself. There may be kinks along the way to slow me down but which of life’s major journeys do not? Despite what I have lost I can still count my blessings. There is only one way for me to go now. That way is forward, undoubtedly.