Crawling My Way Out

Frustration, anger, and a sense of helplessness and hopelessness have been hanging over me for far too long now. I cannot even remember when it began. All I know is that this gloom is fast draining the spirit out of me. It has been a while since I have gotten any proper work done. Days are frittered away, searching; for what, I know not.

Despite the despair, there is one thing that I am glad I did – putting my life into words in this blog. As I pored over the archives, I saw how much I have grown as a person and how much I have achieved what I never thought I could ever accomplish. This reminds me of my response to an interview question: “My blog is a gift to myself in the future.” Indeed it is.

It is times like this that I really need some pick-me-ups. What better place to look for them than in the chronicles of my life? Again and again, as I read about similar episodes over the past three years and how I prevailed over them, I am convinced that this too shall soon pass. It will not be easy but is not impossible. Beyond doubt, The Digital Awakening is one of the best gifts I have ever given to myself.

Author: Peter Tan

Peter Gabriel Tan. Penangite residing in the Klang Valley. Blissfully married to Wuan. A LaSallian through and through. Slave to three cats. Wheelchair user since 1984. End-stage renal disease since 2017. Principal Facilitator at Peter Tan Training specialising in Disability Equality Training. Former columnist of Breaking Barriers with The Borneo Post. This blog chronicles my life, thoughts and opinions. Connect with me on Twitter and Facebook.

6 thoughts on “Crawling My Way Out”

  1. Hey, pull yourself out of the spiral dive man!Stow the speedbrakes,full throttle ahead !Go out to the nearest park and meditate.Stay off carbohydrates and meats as much as you can.Go on a vegetarian and fish diet (leafy veg) and have a chocolate bar every time you need a perk me up.
    Take stock of your position, think positive-we always overlook what we have and don’t thank God enough for it.Like I said, it could be worse.Stay focussed on your objectives and Pete… your life’s waiting outside the pit for you,go live it!

    Peter:
    It is always easier said than done. I do have techniques but those cannot be put into practice when everything seemed hopeless. But thanks anyway. The dark clouds are beginning to clear up now.

  2. This blog has been a blessing to many others too. So you have been a lot more productive than you think, my friend.

    Peter:
    I am glad that some people have found meaning in it. Makes all the effort worth it.

  3. What Marita said. Reading your blog is a pleasure for me, as it reminds me that there’s always a Divine hand in everything we do… and we are all the more blessed for it.

    Peter:
    What else can I say but thank you? Thank you. 😀

  4. Agreed what Marita says.I drop by once a while expecially when i’m down.Your blog indirctly spur me continue tackle problems that I faced in my daily life.
    ” Your Blog is a Gift To Others ”
    Thanks Peter

    Peter:
    I did not know my blog could do that. Thanks for telling. It sure made my day.

  5. I’m being selfish,this is one of my favourite blogsites.And I get withdrawal symptoms when I don’t get my daily dose of “pete’s ramblings”! Glad to see that you’re pullling out of the quagmire and starting to blog again and I’m getting better!Hope to meet you one of these days in Penang and have a natter.
    Your blog has given me a better understanding of the problems facing disabled persons.Keep up the good work!

    Peter:
    I see you like sad stories because that is what my blog essentially is. I hope to meet you too some day. 😀 Thanks for your concern. Really appreciate it.

  6. peter, this blog has also been a gift to me, through your sharing about your trials and your joys. hugs.

    Peter:
    Adriene, I have never told you how impressed I am with you too. One day I will. 😛 Hugs.

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