The Things Friends Ask

I have insensitive busybodies for friends. Two of them asked me the same questions recently.

A and I chatted over the phone.

A: Are you still with your girlfriend?
Me: Yes
A: Is she the same one?

I met B at a shopping complex.

B: Are you still with your girlfriend?
Me: Yes
A: Is she the same one?

Is that the same questions they ask friends they have not met for a long time? Or is it just me?

Author: Peter Tan

Peter Gabriel Tan. Penangite residing in the Klang Valley. Blissfully married to Wuan. A LaSallian through and through. Slave to three cats. Wheelchair user since 1984. End-stage renal disease since 2017. Principal Facilitator at Peter Tan Training specialising in Disability Equality Training. Former columnist of Breaking Barriers with The Borneo Post. This blog chronicles my life, thoughts and opinions. Connect with me on Twitter and Facebook.

8 thoughts on “The Things Friends Ask”

  1. I think there’s always this somewhat cynical expectation for relationships to break down over time. I get that too, and that’s just after a year and a half of seeing the same man. Gets me questioning if monogamy and long term relationships are that much a rarity.

    I love your blog, Peter. Yes, I’m one of those anon readers. I’m such a perve when it comes to good writing. =)

    Peter:
    Thanks for the compliments. In my case, people see me as a disabled person first when it comes to relationships and that it is difficult, if not impossible, for someone to love me.

  2. Yes, it is.

    I get that sometimes too. Though it’s normally elicits a “wow” after that.

    Peter:
    Mine elicited some exaggerated facial expressions – eyes opened wide in disbelief.

  3. I do have insensitive friends like that too. Yeah, they give me the impression that I should change my boyfriend as frequently as they do, or at least as frequently as I can.. =(

    Peter:
    People should learn to mind their own business when it comes to situations like this.

  4. I think it’s just you. LoL… Now my friends like to ask me “You still single?”.

    Peter:
    Just wait till you are my age.

  5. but i asked diff questions everytime i msn with you wor… :p

    Peter:
    I was not talking about you. You have been a great friend. 😀

  6. How odd. People usually ask, “How are you doing”? first. Then again, I try to say as little as possible.

    Peter:
    People usually ask “Have you eaten?” I guess they got bored of that.

  7. I think busybody is the word. They think that it’s in “the trend” to change partners. And just because you havent, they just have to open their big mouth and ask. Mindsets, haih. Dont care what people say! Keep it up, the both of u 😉

    Peter:
    These people should get out more often and meet more people. 😛

  8. We haven´t reached that stage in Malaysia but in some western societies, when you meet a friend you haven´t seen for a while, you dare not assume that they´re still married or if married, still to the same person!

    Peter:
    Lets just say that they have doubts that someone in my condition can have a good relationship.

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