My Guardian Angel

We have been together for eleven years. Wuan is still as caring as she was when we first met, and much more. Many times, I ask myself what I have done to deserve such a wonderful woman. She ensures that all my needs are looked after. She wakes up at 5 am in the morning, every morning, to cook my lunch before she goes off to work. She watches over what I eat like a hawk to keep my declining renal health in check.

We can talk about anything and everything. Our interests are similar. We seldom have disagreements, almost never. She knows what I have in mind even before the words leave my lips. She spurs me on whenever I begin to lose hope. She gives me hope. She inspires me with her optimism. She is that spurt of energy that carries me through the last mile. With her, I have no worries. Life is a bliss. She completes me. She is all that is white and pure. She must be an angel. She is!


There were times when I wished
I could hold you close and tell you
how much my life has changed
because you cared enough
to show me how beautiful life still is

You cared enough to tell me
that I still have one true friend
who accepts me for what I am
and believing that nothing is impossible
if I dare to take the first bold step

I want to tell you that I appreciate
all that you have done for me
the times that we spent talking
and the times that you kept my heart warm
on those cold lonely nights

Thanks for being there always
for listening and understanding
you are truly one of a kind
and I cannot help but wonder
if you are my guardian angel in disguise.

Circa 2001

Have We?

Wuan and Peter Tan at 1 Utama

Have you ever met someone and felt like you have known each other forever? Wuan and I did. We met in IRC. My first message to her was “a/s/l?” which is short for age/sex/location in IRCspeak. I was in Penang, she was in Kuala Lumpur. The computer, the monitor and the telephone line closed the gap of 370 km between us.

We discovered that we shared common interests. We also liked similar food. There was a familiar comfort and warmth in our conversations. We were like long lost friends reunited. We chatted late into the night, every night. We were inseparable. Our friendship soon developed into something more. I knew, I just knew, deep inside me, that she is the one for me.


I don’t think
we have ever met
but inexplicably
our destinies entwined
reaching deep

in a past life perhaps
we were inextricable
I wonder
for we seem to have
an uncanny familiarity
of each other.

Circa 2001

In The Park

Maple tree outside Sogong Underground Shopping Center opposite The Westin Chosun Seoul
Maple tree outside Sogong Underground Shopping Center opposite The Westin Chosun Seoul.

The colours of autumn fascinates me. That is when Mother Nature bursts forth in flames of orange, red, yellow and all hues in between, just before enveloping everything in the blinding white of winter. One day, I want take Wuan to a park awashed in bright fallen leaves of the maple tree. I want to experience together with her autumn in its full splendour.

The closest I came to a maple tree was in downtown Seoul. It stood near one of the entrances to the Sogong Underground Shopping opposite The Westin Chosun Seoul. The season was in transition from summer to autumn. The maple leaves were still fresh green.

I want to soak in the exuberance of autumn with Wuan, listening to the crackling of the dried leaves with each step we take, listening to the wind as it rushes through the forest, shaking leaves off twigs and carrying them aimlessly in its wake. What will autumn smell like? Sweet? Musty? I cannot wait to discover with Wuan the mysteries autumn has to offer.

In The Park

Autumn’s wind
rustling the leaves
stirring up
a golden carpet
of amber and ochre
greeting us
as we walk
hand in hand
in the park.

Circa 2001